My nipple is on Facebook.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
