I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
