My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
