I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I think I sprained my soul last night
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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