I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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