If i could tip my vagina, i would.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
