I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize
