Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
