Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
