Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Randomize
