there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
