I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We left an ass print on the piano.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
i've created a new STD.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
