were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
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