The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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