why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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