i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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