And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
there was a trapeze. enough said
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
