dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize