I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
