I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
