you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
