I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I can't turn off my feet"
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Randomize
