i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
