I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I have fence marks all over my body
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
