i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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