So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
