But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Sorry about my life...
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
