i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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