I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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