Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
My vagina just recognized that song.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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