does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
She announced her abortion via fbk
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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