She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
