I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
My life is pants optional.
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