At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
