3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
