Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize
