I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
