I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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