Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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