the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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