I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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