im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
