my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Just pee around me
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Randomize
