Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
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