Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
