i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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