Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
I understand Curling. That high.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Randomize
