Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize