Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
No more Irish car bombs ever.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
