She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Randomize
