woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
