he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
